Today... I just got back from Tan Tock Seng Hospital.
No, I'm not injured. Let me explain this from my workplace. It was a mixed feelings of happy and sad day today.
Before I left my office, I was told it was my last day at work. Wow. I was happy at the instant she said that... Then I went sad. How am I suppose to pay up for my school fees now?
Yup so I left the workplace just like that feeling two feelings at the same time. I doubt anybody can do that... Well except probably my aussie friend Gail...
Anyway, the moment I was about to reach Tiong Bahru Station, I received a phone call from my mom. Actually, she went to the hospital in the early morning to visit my Great Grandmother which have been hospitalized as she was in critical condition. So this time, it was after work, about 6.30pm, she called me to announced, in a calm voice, that she has... passed on.
I mean, I was not that shock, neither am I happy. I was, in-between. My great-grandma has just passed on. All of a sudden images of the past begin floating in. In case you did not know, my Great Grandma had led a very hard life. She had to do loads of things for her children and one of her children was my grandmother which I dearly love. Yet this Great Grandma, had to work a living for her kids and of course by then, my Great Grandpa was not around anymore. So she had to slog it out herself to raise money for her children.
So there I was, talking to my mom and she told me if i wanted to come down to Tan Tock Seng Hospital. I admitted I was a little reluctant as I was on my way to Sean's house to practice 3D Studio Max. However, I knew in the end I would go. For the sake of encouraging other relatives as well as to be there when such situations happen. So i did. I went down using MRT.
On the way to TTSH, I met my Japanese Teacher from the Community Centre which he taught us. Suzuki-sensei was with his wife. I can tell. But I did not see his face. I tapped his arm and he went. "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh."
"How are you? Genki?" I was smiling. I mean, I haven't seen my sensei and now he's testing me my jap. Well, thanks to Rie I knew how to answer. "Hai, genki desu." He was nodding his head. We did not talk much due to the congestion inside the train car. So I left with a "Sayonara" and he did the same.
I know I am going about random stuff so bare with me. It has been a long day.
On route to TTSH, I was thinking about the times I spent with my Great Grandma. They have not been a close one. I always remembered that she had golden false teeth. She was really friendly during Chinese New Year and I remember we had to shake her hand and get Ang Pow's from her. That was when she had both her legs... Yes, due to some disease, i belief its cancer, they had to amputate both her legs. Actually it was suppose to be one. But they discovered another growth and then they had to cut that too.
I mean imagine. You can't WALK. Forever, wheel-chair bound. I sometimes, admire her because of this. Somemore your self-esteem will be affected. I mean you have ABSOLUTELY no legs!!!
So ya about the memories... I only remembered the times we spent for her during Chinese New Year, its all so vivid. I mean, I was a kid when she was still healthy. And she will always put on that gold teeth smile. I would greet her, and she will go "Good boy".
Hey, but we were not that close. But no matter close or not. We are still part of the family. And relatives are your flesh and blood and thus, we are all in this together. I went to see her in the ward. Her body was still there. Just laying still, her eyes closed, with the breathing tube in her mouth.
Of course naturally, you would want to know how she died. I asked my great uncle's wife. She said she went off peacefully. They did not know she stopped breathing because they were dependent on the machine that monitors heart beat. This was after doctor had administered medication. Then as they were pacing around, one of my relatives noticed the breathing bag was not moving anymore, yet her heart show signs of movement. But the doctor confirmed. That once she's not breathing she's considered gone.
The reason why the heart monitor was still reacting was due to the medication. We stayed there for a long time. About 10pm, the monitor finally came to a line. No more sound, no more beeps. When I went in there, I saw all my Christian relatives are praying for her. For God's blessing upon her and to encourage themselves they said they will see her in heaven... Of course I would want the same hope too. So i did. I just prayed that God would at least visit her and talk to her before anything happens. I blessed her and after that we left TTSH.
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