Take all of me

Take all of me, I give you my all for more of you...

This phrase just appeared in my head as I start wondering what do I type for my upcoming post for this blog. One thing I realized over the past few weeks, that I have been relying on my own strength all this while when I am in Viper Coy. I can't exactly say that God was not part of everything, but I know that I did not lean on him. Either that, or I just lost the touch I had at Asia Conference again. Is this thing normal? Am I just not attune spiritually enough? How do I know if I am Spiritual enough to sense him?

I understand that through PRAYER is how we communicate with him. Probably that is my answer. But my circumstance is right now in the way of such "Luxury". I know that if that is the case, I need to make the sacrifice of my time. However, my job scope of being in the army, is both mentally and physically taxing. I can't really say its an EXCUSE not to pray, after all I do pray at night whenever I can. All I'm trying to say is, I don't think I sense him much whenever I'm in my camp. Its as if, I am alone although I believe that He is within me. Yet my lifestyle depicts a different approach to what I envision myself to be. I wanted to be like Christ, after all it is out goal as Christians, to use Jesus as an example of engaging the World but not compromising His love for God and for His People. I can't say that I have been like that and I do admit that I can be judgemental and have realized that I have been ever since I came into army.

I took a personality test and I had ENFP... Extroverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Perceiving. Now? INFJ. The only thing changed was the E and P changed to I and J. I have become Introverted, and Judging. Now I do not like my judgemental self as I can be a pain in the ass to some people and also detestable to others. Because I judge without thinking the time and place of event and I do not really care about Politics and shoot my mouth off. I realized that it was a big mistake and also stupid because I am demeening somebody this way... Therefore I still keep my Perceiving style because I realized that I was only 18% Judging, that means, my Perceiving is still there, the only thing was I had to Judge because of my current Job Scope as a PS.

What does all my rantings got to do with the First Line? All I'm trying to say is, I want back the time where I gave God my purpose and my life to support the cell group, to rise up again, to stand in the gap, to make friends properly, to be filled once again, to have the hunger and thirst for the word, back to bible study again, back to worship and praise, back to playing my guitar, back to the time in Emerge Conference where I gave my heart in exchange for more of him...

Take all of me, I give you my all for more of you
Move in your Power, Open the Heavens Lord Today
Take all of me, Make us your Light for all to see
Change this World we Live in
Let your Harvest in
Let Your Harvest in

Take all of me for more of you
All Consuming Fire
Take all of me for more of you
You're my Hearts Desire